Humorous Biz Quotes #1

Compiled by Peter/CXO Wiz4.biz 1/13

Every employee rises to the level of his own incompetence. The Peter Principle [ I resent this ]

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.

If it’s stupid but works, it isn’t stupid.

If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.

A company is known by the people it keeps.

Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties

Success is relative. It is what we can make, of the mess we have made of things.

If you would like to know the value of money, try to borrow some. Ben Franklin

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. Napoleon

An Expert is someone called in at the last minute to share the blame.

For maximum attention, nothing beats a good mistake.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it. Bob Hope

Run your Idea up the Flagpole and see if anyone salutes it.

When you’re up to your Armpits in Aligators, its hard to remember that you should have drained the swamp first. President Reagan

Patience, Persistence & Perspiration make an unbeatable formula for Success.

We don’t need more Managers, we need more Motivators, real Leaders

To succeed in life you need Ignorance that you cant do it and Confidence that you can. Mark Twain

A business dedicated to Service will have one worry about Profit. What to do with this large of a sum. Henry Ford

Everyone thinks you should be honest, till you tell the truth about them.

It’s not so much how busy you are, but why you are busy. The bee is praised, the mosquito is swatted.

There are no rules here – We’re trying to invent something. Thomas Edison

An error doesn’t become a mistake, until you refuse to correct it.

Wise men learn by other men’s mistakes, fools by their own.

Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped.

A clean desk means you’re not busy enough

Comments: Do you have any clever one you can add?