Humorous Business Stories

Complied by Peter/CXO Wiz4.biz 6/13

Doctor vs Plumber. A pipe burst in a doctor’s house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a few minutes, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, “This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a doctor!” The plumber waited for him to calm down and quietly said, “Neither did I when I was a doctor.”

Counting on the Boss. Husband goes to see his Supervisor. “Boss,” he says, “We’re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic & the garage, moving & hauling stuff.” The Boss replies: “We’re short-handed. I can’t give you the day off.” Husband: “Thanks, boss, I knew I could count on you! I knew you’d understand”

Old Partnership. Jobs & Woz (coincidence) had started with only $500 each, but they had built up a computer business (Apple?) with sales in the millions, then billions. Their company employed over several thousand people, and the two executives lived like princes & paupers – whichever they felt like. Almost overnight, things changed. Sales dropped sharply, former customers disappeared, and the business failed – BK (not Burger King). Jobs & Woz blamed each other for the troubles, and they parted on unfriendly terms. Five years later, Jobs drove up to a decrepit diner and stopped for a cup of coffee & a pastry. As he was wiping some crumbs from the table, a waiter approached. Jobs looked up and gasped. “Woz!” he said, shaking his head. “It’s a terrible thing, seeing you working as a waiter in a place like this.” “Yeah,” Woz said, curling his lip. “But I don’t eat here.”

Using Humor for everything. Boss: “I’ve decided to use humor in the office. Experts say humor eases tension, which is important in times when the work force is being trimmed”. “Knock knock.” Employee: “Who’s there?” Boss: “Not you anymore. I just fired you. Isnt that funny? It was to me.”

An Example of our Economy. This guy is walking with his friend. He says to this friend, “I’m a walking economy.” The friend replies “How so?” “My hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and both of these together are putting me into a deep depression!”

No Reason to Laff. The Boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody, but one girl laughed uproariously. “What’s the matter?” grumbled the boss. “Haven’t you got a sense of humor?” “I don’t have to laugh,” she replied. “I’m leaving Friday.”

Comments: Do you have any good Biz Jokes or Stories to share? Send them to me. Thanks, Peter/CXO Wiz4biz